Time for sports Q&A 2.0
A second helping of the ol' mailbag

Andi Osters | Columnist for NOISE - ostersan@gmail.com

It's been about six months since I've entertained questions from readers, so I thought it might be time to clear out the ol' inbox and address a few gems.

Question: Which pre-season ranked Spartan basketball team will actually live up to their potential?

Ah yes, the question on every MSU bloggers' fingertips. Pre-season Big Ten rankings for men's and women's basketball came out recently, and both the MSU men and MSU women are ranked high: first for the guys and second for the gals. Those sorts of expectations can weigh heavily on players' minds ... but I think these two programs are ready to rise to the elite level we all have expected for the past three years. Both Tom Izzo and Suzy Merchant have worked to recruit the most talented incoming classes we've seen in a half-decade, and I'm hoping for deep tournament runs for both in March. A welcome respite after this football season.

Q: Why do some college student sections behave like hordes of demon spawn?

Funny you should ask. This past week I went to Western Michigan to watch the Broncos take on the Spartan hockey team at Lawton Arena. Now, I have been to fair amount of collegiate sporting events, but this game will forever stand out. The WMU student section was enormous, loud, Halloween-festive and so horribly offensive and unsportsmanlike that I'm tempted to write a letter to the athletic department. First, I would never dare to bring children under the age of 10 to these games, for fear they'd learn a word or two (yelled in unison) that even adults should use sparingly. They also may find out (thanks to the student section) that a certain ruby-cheeked holiday character does not, in fact, exist. The Broncos should be ashamed of their students for the appalling way they behaved last weekend, which looks even more desperate on the heels of a MSU two-game sweep.

Q: If you were in the octagon against female UFC fighter Gina Carano, how long would you last?

I think the simple answer here is NOT LONG. However, I strongly believe that if I could smack her first, with one free shot, I might have a chance to last one round. I think if I Judo-chopped her in the throat hard enough, I might be able to run away from her for the remainder of the round as she tried to regain the ability to effectively use her esophagus. If I could not hit her first, I'd anticipate a knockout within 30 seconds. Easily. If I escaped with my dignity, I'd be thrilled.

Q: Would you rather be a quarterback taking a blind-side sack or be hit by a 95-mph fastball in the back?

Apparently, some people want to see me in pain. No, joking. Well, after seeing Florida golden boy Tim Tebow take an absolute drill bit to the noggin, I'm going to opt for the fastball. I mean, what's the worst that could happen there? Large welt? Extreme contusion? If it's Pedro Martinez throwing at me, I'd be happy to step in there. What's his fastball these days; 74? Meh. Piece of cake.

Q: Can DeWitt High's football team win the Division III state championship at Ford Field?

I think the Panthers have a good shot. They've got Sexton on Friday, after crushing Mason last week in their first playoff game. A win against the physical and fast Big Reds will be the first of four needed to hoist the MHSAA Finals trophy at Ford Field on Thanksgiving weekend. DeWitt's potent offense will need to continue to produce, and their secondary play needs to be solid: at the regional and semifinal level, high school teams can beat you through the air OR the ground. If you're so inclined, Sexton and DeWitt play at 7 p.m. Friday at DeWitt High School.

Andi Osters, 27, is a Michigan State graduate.